Sunday, May 03, 2009

Gimme Your Dark Side! - a question

I got an E-mail from a person who happened to read my humble blog.

Question: It seems that your blog only represents your so-called bright side and not your dark side? Isn't it a bit unfair? -someone-

My respond:
It's good to listen that my blog radiates brightness, and as a matter of fact, it's the purpose of this blog to lighten up - otherwise I won't give the title of Energizing My Day (just call it Gloom My Day - brilliant!)

However, I understand very well that I am just a human - with all my weakness and limitations. For example, in this post, I wrote how I could be disappointed with some of the best friends I have ever had. In this post, I became super angry towards people who are often late. I didn't hide my troubled past and far-from-perfect background here. Like a striptease show, I bare everything. Yes, everything. No make-up, no photoshop, no mask - welcome to my life.

However, from the every beginning I understand that it's the purpose of this blog - to Energize My Day, and hopefully also Your Day. We live in a gloomy world, with all the gloomy people. Why make it even gloomier my dear friend?

That's all I have. Be positive, be happy, be grateful for everything we have. And...


Well... :p

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

One Thing (or Two) I learned from Rope-Pulling Competition

"We are judged by what we do and how we do it... no matter how small and insignificant that thing might be."

Yes, I believe in that sentence. How we do something determines how we do everything in life. How we treat waiters in the restaurant, how we act on our appointments including casual dinner with friends, and how we say thank-you to the auntie cleaners (or maybe, no thank-you at all, or maybe we are wondering "hey, how come the floor is always clean without any people cleaning it?" gee..)

For me, I always finish whatever I start, and I mean, finish well.

Last Sunday we had "Rope Pulling Competition" or whatever they call it in English. I signed up for it, and if that competition were a Champions League match, I won't be the Lionel Messi or Cristiano Ronaldo. I train hard in the gym, but yeah, maybe I am not genetically muscular, so, well. To make the long story short, I am noone in that competition.

Except for one thing....

I never give up. I always enter a competition with one thing in mind: I am going to win. I give my best (and maybe my best is not enough, but who.bloody.CARES?).

We won our first two matches and we entered the top 6 out of 24 teams. That is quite an achievement if we look at our team: all Asians, noone is particularly big and muscular.

Even when we finally lose to the team who finally topped the whole competition, we lose with our face straight looking at our teams' eyes: proud and satisfied...

And as for me, I know myself too well. When I had a 2-hour non-stop badminton match, I will run for 2 hours. I will catch the shuttlecock wherever it goes even when I need to fall down and get hurt, that's perfectly alright. So whenever I finish something, be it a badminton match or a Rope Pulling competition; be it an exam or a job; be it a 1/2-million-dollar project or a simple speech, I always tap myself on my shoulder, and tell myself:

"Ben, I am so proud of you.Really, Really Proud"


Happy Birthday Regina...

You two are one of the sweetest couples I have ever met (Tom and Katie Cruise not included :D)

Saturday, April 18, 2009


There might be times when we felt that no matter how hard we tried, our society just can't accept us. In 23 years of my life, I have seen countless of so-called good boys or girls who turned naughty just to be accepted by their community. Some tried too hard to be popular, and some who failed finally had to rely on shortcuts like free sex and drugs.

And I know how it feels. I come from a family which is 100 miles from being harmonious, and I know how important the feeling of acceptance is. And given that kind of background, it's perfectly reasonable for me to turn into that kind of people, who are dying just to be accepted.

I know how it feels to have to depend on sleeping pills just to be able to sleep. I perfectly understand how it feels when troubles seem so big that jumping from the 6th floor of university dormitory seems to be the easiest and the least painful way.

Given the kind of acting ability, despite all the troubled past, I was able to hide all the problems behind my back, faking my smile, and appeared that I am the most blessed and problem-free person. Sometimes I didn't only have double personality syndrome, I had many - so many until I lost count. And let me tell you, we can pretend well at some occasions. We can pretend not-so-well at many occasions. However, pretending well at all occasions is just so freaking tiring - something that I did for more than 1 year, perfectly well.

And if not because of God's grace, maybe I had already given up my dream. However, I continued to pursue it, doing lots of things other probably could only dream of - graduating from one of the best universities in Asia, getting multiple job offers long before I graduated, and many other things (read my previous posts).

And I have just realized.. some people try too hard to be accepted. Maybe I tried the hardest... failed, injured, and was left disappointed.
If I were to learn from the mistakes, I would conclude my post with this very beautiful quote:

"God, give me the strength to change the things I can change, the courage to accept the things I can't change, and the wisdom to know the difference."

Some things in life are better left untouched.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

Just because I am no longer 18...

When I was 18 years old, everything seems to happen so slow.

When I am 23, everything seems to be too fast. And when I look back, I always wonder "What the heck have I done for the past 5 years?"
This morning I read China Daily and read that a 22-year-old college student from Wisconsin USA was elected as city mayor. And realizing that I am 1 year older than him and have accomplished nothing in life left me feeling so useless.

However, when I reflected back.. let's say I can live until 80 years old. The journey I have done so far is just over a quarter of it. If my life were a football match, it is not even half-time and for most football matches I watched, the first half of the match is boring. Manchester United scored twice in the last few minutes when they won their Champions league in 1999 and when they won it again last season, the last few minutes period was also the decision factor.

Nevertheless, I think life is short and if I imagine in the last few minutes of my life, I will be asking questions like whether I am satisfied with the life I have.

Maybe I am no longer 18 not even close to that, but I think, never in my life I am feeling so energized. Never in my life I want to (once-again) conquer the world. And never in my life I am feeling so blessed to have some of the finest things in life which can't be bought by money, and some which can be bought by money.

Maybe I am no longer 18, but who.bloody.cares.

P.S. :
1.Friends, thanks for a meaningful 23th birthday.

2. I am going to have a blog in Chinese. Do leave a message or send me an E-mail to suggest for the URL name of my chinese blog :)

3. Some of the finest things in life are FREE. One of those is salvation. Jesus Christ has died for us sinners so we can be saved. Happy Easter and may the spirit of Easter reminds us that we are indeed very, very blessed.

Friday, February 20, 2009

From Guang Zhou with Love

Surprise! Surprise! I know you have been waiting for this post for SO FREAKING LONG. I know that! thanks.. :D I arrived in Guang Zhou 2 days ago and this is my first time writing in my beloved blog... in an internet cafe full of people smoking although there are signs "No Smoking" everywhere.

I am freezing, it's FREAKING COLD here (people, whoever you are, who write in whatever space in this internet that Guang Zhou is hot all year long, I demand your explanation!). You won't believe that you are freezing at 12noon. But I like the weather here. People here have very good skin complexion generally because of this cold weather.

People, when you read something about China which is written by so-called experts, don't believe anything. The only way to experience the real China is by booking your air ticket now and Just Freaking Flying baby! After that, fake your accent so people think that you are a chinese, and dress like what a chinese usually dresses (which means, don't iron your clothes, never.)

First and foremost, China people are not rude like what people say. During 3 days in Guang Zhou, I met lots of friendly people, from a pretty customer service assistant at Bank of China to the auntie who sells "branded goods" for a living. And trust me, her Louis Vuitton, Burberry and such are good, at least good enough for what you pay for. Fifteen yuan for a "Burberry" passport wallet, well, what can you expect?

Second, Guang Zhou is not a cheap place to live at. Not at all. It is almost as expensive as Singapore. The food here is slightly better than Singapore. BUT. It's not HEAVENLY GOOD like what some people told me.

Third, is it just me or my chinese gets so good until I can't believe it myself. When I just arrived, and was going from airport to my university, I could chat with the taxi uncle and he seemed to understand most of what I told him. There are only two options: first, my chinese got better by a lot just by going to Guang Zhou airport toilet, and second, he is a superb actor. I hope the former is right.

Oh, what else should I write? Oh yes, Fourth, Guang Zhou Metro is like Singapore MRT. Sorry Singapore, but I must say, this Metro is almost as good as Singapore MRT and faster (comparing the fare, it's just 1/3 of what you pay in Singapore). It's much better and cleaner than the one in Kuala Lumpur, and just give this city a few more years, this city is going to be unbelievable.

And Fifth, don't believe when people say you should NEVER go to Guang Zhou if you want to learn Chinese because people there speak Cantonese. Guang Zhou people speak mostly chinese just with a slight accent, and there is no reason why it can't stand against Beijing or Shanghai as a place to learn chinese.

OK, when I get my internet application approved next Wednesday, I shall post some photos. A person beside me is smoking like hell and I can't stand it.

And Singapore, I miss you like crazy.

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

5 hours

Wohoo... I and my negotiation skill. I exchanged SGD to RMB today and a bit sweet talk (and some winks for course :D) could save me RMB300 - save that for a trip to Hong Kong for free :D

I know I am irresistible... *wink*

It's just over 5 hours before my flight...

13 Hours

Everything is ready. Clothes, books, toiletries, documents, shoes (Gosh, I don't know that I have 7 pairs of shoes). Total packing time: 5 hours.

When I go for a short few-days trip, I just need 2 hours max to pack up my stuffs, and to move from one country to another, yes, 5 hours - that's all I need :)

By this time tomorrow, I will be on the way from Bangkok to Guang Zhou, no sleep tonight. I hope the placement test doesn't take place tomorrow because that would mean I will perform way below my standard due to the lack of sleep (I mean, no sleep at all). However, if that's the case, I would rely on my trusted friend - Red Bull (don't know what they call it in China.)

This morning, I had a short walk around my house and felt that Singapore is very beautiful. I know I am being biased - we think something is so good when we are about to lose it or already lost it (Ever seen someone being accused and blamed at their funeral?)

This has been a wonderful 5 years, in a small country I now already call "home".

Sunday, February 15, 2009

The Truth About Words

My dear friend,
It is sometimes hurtful to know the truth. However, not knowing the truth is even sadder (I would prefer to know that I am ugly like shit than thinking I am a Brad Pitt which is a self-delusion at its best.)

I believe that whatever comes out from our mouth is what we will be judged from. Just like when we are not to shit anywhere except inside toilets, it's just a common sense that we just say something positive and uplifting, not over-promise and under-deliver, ecetera ecetera.

I am well-known to be very straightforward and sometimes, extremely blunt. No, backstabbing people is not in my life's dictionary. I would rather stab them straight on their face, which is at least 1000 times more fun. So, if there are some words which are just too harsh to accept, I am terribly sorry.

2 days to go, and it's just SO FUCKING HARD to leave this place with all its amazing people. I will definitely miss you guys so much!

P.S. I am writing this post inside NTU hall of residence 2's computer room. This place brings back lots of memories of my first year of university education. Yes, a cute, fat, happy, and naive me. I am now getting slimmer, even cuter (awww...), less happy, but still as naive as ever.
Time flies huh...

A Life Without Regret

Because we only live once, why not make it a great one?

Why can't we seize each and everyday as if It were our last? Loving and expressing our love to someone we really love as if we don't have another chance? And working hard and playing hard as if we were in a reality show called "How Interesting is Your Life?"?

Sure we have lots of regrets. I have so many regrets in life that I can write a book on it. However, I choose to live my life as a glass half-full instead of half-empty, and this is my life, the best I could give, and the best God could ever think of.

Even if I die tomorrow in a plane crash, I can proudly tell God in heaven.. "God, I am done, no regret." ... and if I were to choose, I would choose a great 23 years than an average 93 years.

Friday, February 13, 2009


Tomorrow might be my last match (or probably was it last week?). With my 0-2 record, I don't expect too much that I will be playing.

However, if the captain asks me to play, I will definitely give my everything (I always say, maybe my best is not good enough, but who bloody cares baby???). Anyways, there's not much difference between 0-2 and 0-3 record, so I have nothing to lose. It's like playing against Manchester United. If you lose, that's okay. If you win, wow, that's something. And I always play very well without any expectation whatsoever, so... expect a masterpiece tomorrow! hehe... :D

I will be also preparing as emcee for IG closing ceremony tomorrow. With such a good respond from people I met after Opening Ceremony, there will be high expectation towards me. So, it's not easy to be better than something which is already quite great. I must think outside the box and exceed people's expectation one more time.

OK, 4 days to go. I am learning Chinese all the time now, and I can smell Guang Zhou 1600 miles away.

Small note, my body fat percentage reaches the lowest point in 2 years, 14.3% from 15.7% last month with body muscle increases slightly from 80.5% last month to 81.5%. According to the experts, it's quite good, but if I remember correctly, last time I could reach 12% or around there. I know I am older now, but if I could achieve it last time, there's no reason for me not to be able to achieve it this time.

... now going to shower. Cya!!!

Thursday, February 12, 2009

6 days

Oh My God, by this time 6 days from now, I will be transiting in Bangkok while waiting for the next day's flight to Guang Zhou. It's hard to leave Singapore, a place which I have called "home" for the past 5 years. It's indeed very very hard.

However, as Brad Pitt said in his movie, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, our life is defined by its opportunities, including the ones we missed. I don't want 15 years from now, looking back at this opportunity and regretting not to take it up.

People call it "culture shock" not without reasons. There will be lots of differences between Singapore and Guang Zhou, and someone like me who speaks limited Mandarin will need to struggle to survive, but well, I know myself too well. If a newspaper commissions me to go to The Middle East to report a war there, I can fly there as early as tonight. That's how fearless I am.

OK, wish me all the best and miss me like crazy :D

Monday, February 09, 2009

Kids These Days...

First Kid

When I read my Mandarin book on the way back home, trying to memorize some chinese characters from a book titled "Fun With Chinese Characters", a small boy aged around 10 or 11 started to read from my book as well. And it seems that he could memorize those chinese characters faster than me.

If there were only two of us, I would find that boy cute. However, because the boy looked so excited looking at my book and there were so many people there, EVERYONE then started to look at my book as if there's a lucky number to win lottery or such. Oh, totally paiseh.

Second Kid

When I walked from Bukit Batok MRT to my home, I met a kid near the vending machine. OK, nothing strange... until I saw what he bought. He bought a RED BULL!!! Oh My Gosh, he is just 10 years old at most, and he already consumed something that I started drinking only when I was 18. I couldn't remember when was the first time I consumed coffee to help me stay awake, I think I was at least 15 or 16.

Oh, kids these days are totally different from when I was a kid. *sorry to sound so old =P*

Sunday, February 08, 2009

My Second Loss

First of all, for some friends who expressed their concerns toward me after I blogged about my disappointment yesterday, thanks so much, really appreciate that (this is not sarcasm, zhen de zhen de :)). People say, the true test for friendship is when one or all the parties are in their life's lowest point. Thanks for showing your true colours :)
Just a minor concern: When you promise that you will be coming for something, you better make sure you come, or give a valid reason. It's a small thing, but that decides whether you are trustworthy or not.

Well, I lost again for the second time out of two matches I did, that makes me in the tie-worst position in my team with 0-2 record, despite our team advanced to the semifinal and will be facing a mountain-high task against Malaysia. But this is sport and anything can happen in the court, so keep our fingers crossed ;)

I am not a politician, but I think for someone who can negotiate anything and persuade anyone to do whatever I want, I will just provide some explanations for my loss.

1. My eyesight is getting worse everyday. I think I am not ready to wear specs when playing bcoz my specs is not designed for sports. However, playing without a specs is indeed a disadvantage for me. I can't even look at the back of the opponent's court!

2. I was against the best player in the other team. If a club like Manchester City can have Robinho, I think there is no reason for any team not to have a star player, and sadly, that player was playing against me. My opponent also won against a star player from China, so well...

3. I was nervous. I think this is totally sad. Everytime I play badminton for fun, I play well.. but sadly, everytime I play in a competition, I play way below my standard.

4. 11-point rally really tortured me. I always feel that 21-point system is way better. I usually play not so well in the beginning of the set and improve as the game progresses when the opponent starts to get tired. However, 11-point system puts players like me into a disadvantage position (Taufik Hidayat also felt the same way, so this is a global concern). When I make 3 or 4 mistakes, that's almost half the set. Unbelievable.

However, despite all the explanations, I didn't escape from my responsibility although I played better today compared to yesterday. If yesterday I was at 50% of my maximum ability, today I rate myself at 75%. Hopefully next week if I play again, I can be at my 100%. Even if I lose (and that makes my record 0-3), I can be satisfied that I have given my best. Maybe my best is not good enough, but who bloody cares??

Saturday, February 07, 2009

Oh well, it's over. It should be.

I've learnt in life... we shouldn't cry over what's passed. When we are able to take lessons from our past mistakes, that's good enough. Noone is perfect (although I always say that I am noone).

Take a deep breath, curse and shout "FUCKKKKKK" as loud as you can, close your eyes... and *shuh* your sin is forgiven. Not successful? Run on a treadmill at 13km/hour, and run and run and run until you are out of breath and full of sweat (it's best if your knee is bleeding because of too much run, the feeling is SO FREAKING AWESOME). For me, it helps, a lot.

I never know it's that easy.

Where were you when I expected you to be there?

Actually I wanted to make this post private, but I guess the purpose of this blog is to represent me, as the way I am - no make-up, no photoshop, no mask.

Well, my first badminton match this year after last year we grabbed 3 gold medals and 2 silver medals. This year is probably my last year playing, and that's why this is very important for me.

To make the long story short, I lost the match. Quite close, but losing is losing, and that's just sad.

Thanks for those who reminded me again and again that it was my fault that our team lost. Without you reminding me, I already felt very guilty, so thanks for pouring some salt on my wound, really appreciate your kind heart.

But what makes me even sadder is that... some people whom I expected to watch me playing were not there.

When I did emcee, noone was there among the audiences. Noone. I know it's 9 in the morning, but we usually get up before 7 when we work or have class, so to say that 9am is too early is just another excuse not to see, and that's just sad. I had been waiting and hoped that at least one of the people I expect to come showed up, but yes, I was left disappointed despite the great success. People I met said that we (my partner and I) did a great job emceeing, but yeah, some success are simply meaningless when there is noone to share with.

When we put so much emphasis on Saying Goodbye, why is it that during probably our last days together (I say "probably", who know my plane crashes, we will never know), some people are just not here?

I thought friends are to support each other in terms of happiness and sadness. Not just hanging out watching movies together, wasting money shopping, going to some stupid cafes, eating out, gossiping. Yes, those are fun, but hey, I can meet someone today and tomorrow we can watch movie or eating out together, so what's special?

Yes, and when I lost my match, some people were not there. Yes, two people showed up and I won't forget those for the rest of my life. For the rest, maybe it's not important for you, I don't know. Maybe you had something else to do like for example sleeping or such, I don't know. Or maybe watching people playing badminton is not fun, although for me, this was probably my last match and that's definitely very very important. And maybe this was my last two chance emceeing, and that's very very important. And I was left disappointed when some people just weren't there to support me.

OK, maybe this is 21st century, and friendship is just about watching movies together, shopping, gossiping totally useless stuffs like who marry who or who are gays, who are straight. Maybe I expect too high and therefore, disappointed.

I can't say if those people I expect to come really did come I would win the match. I will never know. I understand perfectly well that I am not Taufik Hidayat or Lin Dan. But when someone so ordinary like me playing for probably my last matches, and probably one of the last times emceeing, can't I expect some people who are so special in my life to be coming and cheer me even if I lost the match?

ANYWAYS, thanks for being so kind, and understanding, and attentive.

P.S. I am okay, it's over. No worries ;)

Friday, February 06, 2009

Addicted to Sports

I don't smoke at all (no offence to smokers, but I have been trying so hard to find a reason why people say smoking is cool, but I really can't find any, gomen...).

The only addictions I have are luckily relatively good ones. I used to be addicted to work, and felt so panic when I have nothing to do. And I have just realized one thing.. that I am addicted to playing sports.

I know last time I played badminton to the extreme, playing 6 straight hours from 9 at night to 3 o'clock in the morning, and skipped the 9am class (don't blame me, blame the alarm clock, it didn't shout louder =P).

However, as I get older, fatter, and weaker (Gosh, those three words give me nightmare, can anyone please eliminate those words from English language?), I thought my addiction to playing sports has disappeared. Until today....

I went to gym at 10.30, had a gym session from 10.30 to 12.30 (no gossiping session, as there were only two persons in the gym and the other party was listening to ipod). After that as if I didn't exercise enough, I went to the treadmill machine and started running. I planned to run for 15 minutes, but then I felt SO FREAKING GOOD and decided I would run for another 10 minutes. I got addicted in running and couldn't stop it! Finally I ran for almost 1 hour straight.... and btw, that's after 2 hour of gym session. If my body fat percentage doesn't go down by 2%, God is really being unfair to me.

I almost wanted to take a shower, but the swimming pool outside gym was simply irresistible. I finally decided to swim for some laps, and at the end, I swam for about 1/2 hour. Well, I couldn't say that I am good at swimming. But at least in case of emergency, I can swim for 1/2 hour before some people notice that I am too cute to be left sunk. *wink*

Btw, talking about sports, if you are NTU students or alumni.. or simply anyone (can't find person who doesn't belong to this category =D), don't forget to come to NTU International Games 2009 Opening ceremony tomorrow (7th Feb 2009). There will be two cute emcees (one of those is me =P), lucky draw, and most importantly, lots and lots and lots of fun. The venue is NTU Sports and Recreation Centre (SRC), at 830am sharp.

See you there!

To Hell all the Latecomers!

I hate people who like to be late without valid reason and without prior notice, they deserve a cozy place in hell - yes, hell with a view.

When I make appointment at 5 o'clock, I really mean 5, not 5.10 or 5.20. I always plan to come earlier, and I can wait because I always bring a book to read inside my bag. Nevertheless, I get very angry everytime someone is late even if he is late by 1 minute. I don't show it in my face because as I always said, I can act very well. But in heart, please rest assured I curse you like hell.
Come on, you are not the only one who is busy. Everyone is busy, so if I can make an effort to be on-time, why can't you?

I know people who have different background have their own standard regarding lateness. Some people feel that being late by 15 minutes is so-called "okay", and for some, being late by 1 hour is considered acceptable. Rubbish! That's one of the most stupid things I have ever heard. And let me tell you, if I were you, I would be terribly ashamed to be born in a society which tolerates lateness. Super terribly ashamed.

If someone is late, that means he doesn't value my precious time. And if someone doesn't value my precious time, he can't value me as an individual. I know it's just simple thing but in this world, we are continuously judged by every simple thing, and for some people, they have failed long time ago.

Wednesday, February 04, 2009

My 2 Talented Brothers

My elder brother from US visited me in Singapore and that's the first time we met after a freaking 4 1/2 years!

I have just realized that here in my apartment, I don't have any plate, bowl, glass, fork, not to mention knife and frying pan. I only have one big cup and one spoon... and that's enough for me to survive! Gosh.

I always feel that I don't have any talent in cooking. Most of the times, lacking of talent is just a very nice way to express laziness. Well, I don't expect to be good in cooking if what I have are just one big cup and one spoon. The best I can make with those two items is cereal drink. Oh well...

My younger brother is getting more and more admirable everyday. He got a perfect GPA last semester - I am not surprised. He has got one of the finest natural talent in arts and design I have ever seen. However, what I feel most proud about him is that he has grown so much these years. I still remember a few years ago when he consulted me regarding his further education and now he is the one who gives me advices on my further education.

To be sandwiched by two very talented brothers makes me even more determined to achieve the very best in life. I am determined to be a millionaire before 30 years old, and willing to do anything to reach that. Anything that is legal, moral, and ethical.

Sunday, February 01, 2009

It's about Friendship

Friends, I know I am not the nicest person of earth (and never make it to New Year's resolution or any resolution whatsoever.)

I may throw sarcastic jokes like "I know I am fat but I can diet, while you are ugly and that's eternal... well, until you do a plastic surgery, but I guess they will need at least 1 litre of plastic to get a reasonably good product... oh wait, that's not environmentally friendly... well, just like your face which gives people a nightmare or two"

Ouch ouch ouch.

I know I may not be the best person to give any form of encouragement although I always try hard (sometimes too hard) to make anyone who comes to me feel better after he meets me.

However friends,

You know too well how important you are in my life. You know that you have a super VIP room in my heart that is so exclusive that other people can't afford to rent it, not to mention buy it. And you know that whenever you feel you need a listening ear (or a busybody to solve your problems forever, oh that's my speciality! =D), I am here.

God bless you all just like how He bless Barack Obama.

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Type of Girl?

I guess in this civilised society, being beautiful doesn't guarantee someone to be The Dream Girl. I am not trying to be shallow. I know physical attributes count, especially for the first few seconds. However, as time goes by, good personality counts more than just look.

As I was grilled by my friends what type of girl I like, I couldn't give a satisfactory answer on the spot, but I did think about that question and here is my answer.

I like a girl who has confidence. If she has the body of Britney Spears, that's great. However if what she has is the body of a pregnant Britney Spears, so what? Be confident. Please don't continuously tell us how fat you are.

1st case: If you are not fat at all. There is nothing more annoying in this world than a perfectionist.

2nd case: If you are indeed fat like an obese pig. We know that like, very well. Hence repeating so many times that you are fat won't help

I love smart and knowledgeable girls. It's indeed frustrating to chat with someone with very little knowledge to begin with. Well, I don't expect someone to have the brain of Einstein, but please don't tell us:

1. That Tiger Woods is an animal.
2. That Barack Obama has some blood relation with Osama Bin Laden.
3. That Manchester United is the best soccer club in the world. No, it isn't! Juventus is. Haha I am being subjective =P

or such stupid statement like those. I know not everyone is blessed with smart brain, but some people really give up trying to upgrade themselves.

I love a girl with some ambitions. People without ambition bore me to death.

And lastly, funny girls definitely get my admiration. Someone who can crack up some smart jokes or laugh at themselves sometimes (Come on, noone is perfect, so why must we be so tensed-up with our imperfection?). I think being around someone with good sense of humour is indeed a blessing.

I want to end this post by quoting a very beautiful prayer:

"God, grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
the courage to change the things I can;
and the wisdom to know the difference."

Skin colour, bone structure, family background, place of birth - those things we can't change. I myself have a fair skin no matter how hard I try (I did kayaking for 9 straight hours under hot sun, and my skin didn't get any tanner), and as a matter of fact, I had accepted that reality long time ago.

Some things in life we can change - our future, our potential life partner, etc. Why not we focus on those things instead?

Indeed, someone who can love herself unconditionally is stunningly very attractive. I spent 3 full years waiting for this type of girl after finally gave up. Even until now, I still insist that the 3-year is "the time worth spent."

Monday, January 26, 2009

Eat these and Happy Lose Weight! (hint: Oranges are inside)

Wow, knowledge really IS power. I know long time ago that a piece of cake provides calorie equivalent to 4 big apples although the later definitely cures hunger better than the former. However, this new piece of knowledge absolutely shocked me. I was totally blown away!

Ready to hear this piece of good news?

Some foods are actually negative calorie foods; means: Energy needed for our body to process it is more than energy that particular food provides to the body. Means: The more you eat it, the more you lose weight. If that's not a piece of good news, I don't know what is.

Anyways, this is the list of that wonder group of food.

List of Negative Calorie Foods

green cabbage
celery root
celery chicory
hot chili peppers
garden cress
green beans
lemon mango
pineapple raspberries
lamb's lettuce

Well, so you don't need to stick with just that boring spinach or onion. Pick and choose and let me know if you are ready to buy smaller size of jeans.

Btw, if you don't know how to start, don't you notice that orange is inside the list? So why not eating those oranges someone gave you for Chinese New Year?

Source: here and here

Saturday, January 24, 2009

In the process to find my own Hillary Clinton

It really bothers me when someone asked me about this girl or that girl... It's not that I am too choosy when it comes to dating. But seriously speaking, I am no longer a 15 or 16 year-old teenager whom you can spot at Bugis Junction buying funky clothes, or at Cineleisure watching movies. I am a grown soon-to-be 23 year old. Working full-time, with mountain-high ambition to be a millionaire before 30. Yup that's me.

I have learned the hard way how a bad choice of girlfriend can potentially be dangerous for my wallet, health and soul... and decided that picking a girlfriend is a serious matter, which requires deep thoughts and some self-reflection - and ah yes, professional advice.

And mind you, a girlfriend is not just someone who can accompany you for dinner, movies, and such. She must share what you believe in, and must be able to support you (and you support her), believe that you can achieve whatever you want... and work with you to get what you want (and you help her to get what she wants).

Behind every successful man, there is a supportive woman. When Bill Clinton did some affairs with Monica Lewinsky, he better thanked God that he has a wife like Hillary. She knew Bill was wrong, but she accepted it with a big heart. That saved Bill's reputation and until now, Bill is still one of the most respected US presidents ever despite his mistake. Hillary also has a very successful career in politics, became senator and almost made it to US' number one. Now she is the Secretary of State. I can't imagine if Hillary couldn't forgive Bill.... cried, asked for divorce... ah, loser!

And before I find my own Hillary Clinton, I guess being single is ultimately the best choice. How if I can't find my Hillary? No worries, I don't mind settling with my own Michelle Obama. Oh, can she dance! =)

Friday, January 23, 2009

Pictures + Updates!!!

We were at TCC Orchard. I was with 1 guy and 1 girl who will make perfect ambassadors for anti-aging cream or supplement (I am totally jealous, how can you guys be so forever young??!)

NTU students, International Games 2009 (IG2009 in short) is coming, bigger and better. With 14 sports and recreation games (including tennis, DOTA, Counter Strike, athletics, and badminton among others...), I am sure this is gonna be the best IG EVER!

I was asked by its Chairperson, Clement Zichri Ang to be the emcee for opening and closing ceremony (which is just 1 day before I fly to Guang Zhou on 16 Feb). My partner for this year's IG would be Linsien, a lovely young lady. This year's IG will be my third consecutive year I become the emcee after IG2008 and IG2007 on which I was the vice-chairperson.

If you haven't registered for this event, you can do so here. A free T-shirt will be given out and hey, I don't know the price of that T-shirt, but I know the price of HAVING FUN is simply priceless.

Guys, you really must come to this event. There will be lots of freebies, lots of fun, lots of beautiful gals and handsome guys.... and most importantly, it's not everyday you can see me on stage emceeing and in court playing badminton =P

See you there!

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Negotiation skill is an art

Sometimes I think that I am blessed with excellent negotiation skill ("blessed" is a humble way to say it, in fact, I worked on it for years.)

From free spa voucher to over $120,000 of sponsorship money, from going to eating place I want to flexible working hours. The most recent one is when I asked for additional gold medals for a competition I join (from 8 medals to 18, what I need is ONE E-mail, that's it =))

I get them all. I get almost everything I want, exactly the way I want them. What I need to do is just asking (everything is just a wink away =D).

Some people call it manipulation, but I beg to differ. I think negotiation skill is not the same as manipulation. It's a fine art. It's giving people what they want in exchange with what we want. People want to feel good (through recognition, praise, etc) and in the same time, they are afraid to appear stupid and powerless.

And that makes me totally irresistible *wink*

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Kaka: I listened to my heart to stay at Milan

Kaka says he has 'listened to his heart' in deciding to stay at AC Milan and rejecting a world-record breaking move to Manchester City.

The Premier League club's audacious bid to sign the Brazilian star in a £100million-plus deal collapsed on Monday night after Milan owner Silvio Berlusconi confirmed Kaka was staying at the San Siro.

City later claimed that they had withdrawn from the negotiations, but the player himself made it clear that he made the decision of own accord.

"I feel great in a place where everybody loves me and I'm very happy to stay," he told Italian TV. "My family were great allowing me to take the decision independently. I never argued with my father, as somebody wrote. I have listened to my heart as many people advised me to do.

"At Milan there are many wonderful people like [Berlusconi] and Leonardo, who is much more than a director for me, he is a real friend.

"I have never asked for a raise in my salary and I will never do. Milan were always nice to me raising my salary whenever they felt it was fair to do it. I can only thank them for this.

"After Saturday's game many people showed me their support, I have received drawings by kids trying to convince me to stay. It was wonderful. I remember when I left Sao Paolo some fans protested against me, here they all stand by my side instead.

"I'm currently celebrating this decision at home with a couple of friends. I'm a religious person and I believe the path God decides for us is not always the most logical one.

"Milan had never considered any offer for me in the past. This time it was different and I had to think about it but then I decided to stay. My team-mates were incredible. They all tried to tell me something and stay close to me in this period.

"I haven't been a Manchester City player not even for one minute."

Kaka also told AC Milan TV that he had prayed to God to find the right decision, saying: ''I believe I have made the right choice. To have gone to Manchester City could have been a great project but in the past few days I have prayed a lot to understand what the right team would be and in the end I have decided to remain here.

''I don't want anything else, I just want to be well and be happy in the place where people love me.

''From this story I have understood how people love me at Milan, the fans and my team-mates have helped me make this choice.''

Former Middlesbrough star Juninho said Kaka, whom he played with for Brazil, was more interested in medals than money.

Juninho told the Daily Telegraph: ''He will want to be the FIFA world player of the year again and that will mean he wants to play for a team that is winning titles and competing in the Champions League.

''Everyone knew that it would not only be money that Kaka was concerned about. He would have wanted to be confident about the plan for the future at Manchester City. He would want big players to be involved. It's not just about the money.

''He would have wanted to see what opportunities there were at Manchester City and decide what he wants because to be honest for them to become a club like AC Milan it would take a long, long time. It would not have taken three or four years but a lot longer for them to become as strong as AC Milan.''


Kaka, My Kaka...

In this materialistic world where money can turn everything around, it's indeed very relieving to see someone who is not only blessed with incredible talent, but also a heart made of gold, a super quality loyalty, and an unshakable faith in God.

Monday, January 19, 2009


Since when a "bye" is good so people call it "goodbye"?

*background music: Air Supply's Goodbye"

By this time next month, I will be in Guang Zhou.

Au revoir, take care, miss me like crazy... because I will miss you all!

Hug, Kiss, Love,

The one and only Benny Pandowo

Love Quote of The Day

"When you love someone, let her go. If she comes back, she is meant to be yours forever. If she doesn't, wish her all the happiness...

... Love is patient; love is kind and envies no one. Love is never boastful, nor conceited, nor rude; never selfish, not quick to take

... Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things"

Sunday, January 18, 2009

Life Irony / Ironi Hidup

There are millions of people do abortion, and millions others will do anything to be able to give birth to a child.
Ada jutaan orang melakukan aborsi, dan jutaan lainnya bersedia melakukan apapun supaya bisa melahirkan anak.

Some people only say "I love you" during wedding and funeral.
Beberapa orang hanya pernah berkata "Saya mencintaimu" saat pernikahan dan upacara pemakaman.

It takes tens of years to build trust, and seconds to destroy it... and we only need suspicion, not facts.
Untuk membangun kepercayaan dibutuhkan puluhan tahun, dan hanya beberapa detik untuk menghancurkannya... dan yang kita butuhkan hanyalah kecurigaan, bukan fakta.

If people put so much emphasis on first love, why only few first loves turn into marriage?
Kalau orang begitu menekankan cinta pertama, mengapa hanya sedikit cinta pertama yang berlanjut sampai pernikahan?

We realize how much we need something after we lose it.
Kita menyadari betapa kita membutuhkan sesuatu hanya setelah kita kehilangannya.

People realize something is wrong, but do it anyway.
Orang menyadari bahwa sesuatu itu salah, tetapi tetap melakukannya

In many parts of the world, the word "CHRISTmas" is much more popular than "CHRIST".
Di banyak tempat di dunia, kata "Natal" jauh lebih populer dibanding kata "Kristus"

Some people try too hard to impress someone who actually doesn't give a damn.
Beberapa orang berusaha terlalu keras untuk mengambil hati seseorang yang sebenarnya sama sekali tidak peduli.

In sports competition, the difference between $100,000 and $10,000 is sometimes just 0.01 sec.
Di perlombaan olahraga, perbedaan antara (hadiah) $100,000 dan $10,000 kadang hanyalah 0,01 detik.

When we are still students, we want to go to work soon. And after we start working, we realize that indeed schooldays are the happiest days.
Ketika kita masih belajar, kita ingin cepat-cepat kerja. Dan setelah kita mulai kerja, kita menyadari bahwa masa sekolah adalah masa yang terindah.

Some 18-year old carry themselves as if they are 30, and some 30-year old just never seem to
grow up.
Beberapa orang yang berumur 18 tahun bisa membawa diri mereka seperti umur 30 tahun, dan beberapa orang yang berumur 30 tahun sepertinya tidak pernah tambah dewasa.

We celebrate our birthdays with great parties without realizing that we are 1 year closer to death.
Kita merayakan ulang tahun besar-besaran tanpa menyadari bahwa kita 1 tahun lebih dekat ke kematian.

Some parents wait for more than 10 years for the next "I love you" their children say.
Beberapa orang tua menunggu lebih dari 10 tahun untuk kalimat "saya sayang kamu" selanjutnya dari anak-anak mereka.

We treat some friends like family members and some family members like total strangers.
Kita memperlakukan beberapa teman seperti anggota keluarga, dan memperlakukan anggota keluarga seperti orang asing.

We work so hard to accumulate wealth and neglecting our health, and in our old days, we use our wealth just to restore our health.
Kita bekerja keras mencari uang dan mengabaikan kesehatan kita, dan di masa tua kita, kita menghabiskan uang hanya untuk mengembalikan kesehatan kita.

And the most ironic of all...

Beauty fades, but dumbness remains
Kecantikan memudar, tetapi kebodohan adalah abadi.

By: Benny Pandowo

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

My Friend series: The one and only one Kartika Widianti

It's great to be my friends, you will get the chance to be formally introduced (Read: humiliated). You can read my previous My Friend series at my older posts.

Andy Warhol said "In the future everyone will have their 15 minutes of fame". For this special friend of mine, your 15 minute might be now. Enjoy!


Name : Kartika Widianti (pronounced as Car-Tee-Kuh Wee-Dee Aunty) or Tika in short.

At our "honeymoon", we were tourists in our own country =D

Age : 24 or 36 or 48. She told me her Chinese horoscope sign is Ox, so her age is either 24 or 36 (or 48 maybe?) this year, not easy to guess huh?

Sign : everyone is welcome

Hobby : shopping, bitching, reading magazine

Hometown: same as Ronald Haryanto, Purwokerto (a city, famous for its maids =D)


- Food : Anything with 3 spoonfuls of chili

- Band : The Ting Tings

- Magazine: Cosmo and such

- Shops : TOPSHOP, ZARA, River Island, Ted Baker, and the mightiest of all, Marc Jacobs

- Film : gay porn

- Personal Trainer : California Fitness' TANK

- Actor : Benny Pandowo.

- Friend : Benny Pandowo. Her crush, Yulia Tudy comes second.

- Blogger : Benny Pandowo. In the 2nd and 3rd position: Perez Hilton and Bryanboy.

OKAY, I think it's not fair if one person dominates the list although he deserves it.


- "Just like CK underwear when it comes to magazine, nothing comes between me and my magazine."

- "I think he is gay" - a standard comment for a handsome hearthrob who hasn't married after 30 years old

- "I don't like chinese movies, I can't stand the way they talk"

- "That boy is very noisy, he deserves to DIE"

- "He looks good in that piece of clothes.. but I think he looks better if he is naked"

and the ever-famous....

- "Majorly infatuated with........" (hey, why not make it patented?)

Sunday, January 11, 2009

My 2 cents about Religion

Disclaimer: Opinions I mention below are just my personal opinions. I do not represent any religious group whatsoever.

I was not born in a catholic family although my 2 brothers are both catholic. We went to catholic school and as the result of it, we became catholic. Until now, both my parents are still not catholic, and although my mother has not been baptised yet, she prays very often everyday, maybe more than what I do in a few days.

Despite that seemingly very normal process of becoming a catholic, I believe in God and I believe that nothing is coincidental in this world. I believe that God has planned that I went to catholic school and as a result, becoming a catholic.

My spiritual life has experienced ups and downs (although the "ups" are not very fantastic I must say). I behave like what a catholic usually do (not what he should do). We attend church to avoid feeling guilty, we seldom or never read the bible, and we don't do much religious activities besides going to church. In short, I think I wouldn't be the first person anyone would think of someone very religious, although I don't think I would be the last also.

Although I have never been too close to God, I know I love Him, He loves me, and I can speak to Him whenever I need to. Borrowing a banking term, maybe I am God's privilege customer (so are you my friend, He never does mass-market banking and His call hotline doesn't require you to wait for 1 hour, talking to that stupid machine operator.)

Some of the happiest and most successful people I know are very religious. Some of them are very active in church, some of them in mosque, and some of them are Buddhists at its best. I believe there is a place in our heart that can be filled by God only, and not by money, car, or sex. I used to read bible everyday and I reckon those days are the happiest days in my life although ironically, during that time, I experienced some of my darkest days with lots of problems and whenever I saw from level 6 at my dormitory, I wanted to commit suicide.

One day, that suicide thought appeared again in my mind, and as usual, I refused to cry. Boys don't cry. However, I felt that God touched my heart so strongly that I cried and couldn't stop it. I felt God talked to me..

"Ben, I know it has been hard for you, but those problems appear not without any reason whatsoever. I want to prepare you to be stronger than ever before. I want to see you touch souls and lives, and be my witness. You can cry, in fact you should cry if you think that will make you better. But don't give up Ben. I am with you. ALWAYS."

I know I may not be the best person to talk about God, but if you have experienced something like that, it's difficult not to talk about it. I know in daily conversation, we are not supposed to talk much about religion. People nowadays don't want to be too involved in religion, maybe because they think that religion is old-fashioned and people don't want to be called hypocrite because they don't do what they preach. However, I personally believe that we don't need to be a Saint to talk about God, and I make my stand clear, I CHOSE TO be baptised in catholic church 10 years ago and for me, that means promise. Promise to serve God, promise to be different, and promise to answer my calling.

I know some people don't like when I blog about something religious, but ladies and gentlemen, this is the nuts and bolts of my life with all the good things and imperfections. I am not interested in pleasing everyone and be popular. It's always the true intention of this blog - to write about myself in the most honest way: no make-up, no photoshop, no mask. This is my life and in case you don't know: in my life, I am in-charge.

I find high-heel shoes to be very ridiculous

Dear Diary, I always find it very uncomfortable when I see a woman wearing high-heel shoes so uncomfortably that it makes people around them feel very uncomfortable. Well, some gals wear it so stunningly elegant, but we all know there must be an exception in everything.

Gals, why must you torture yourself by wearing that kind of ridiculous shoes and walk like a robot, just in this case, a high-maintenance one?

Well, I know everyone wants to look pretty and tall. However, COME ON. Is it just me or everyone will see one's height THEN SUBTRACTING WITH THE HEIGHT OF THE HEEL, then get an idea of how tall someone is. So, don't ya think wearing high-heel shoes is a bit unnecessary? And somemore, expensive?

And please, when you are as tall as or even taller than your boyfriend, don't wear high-heel shoes for the sake of your boyfriend's ego. We men have high ego (for me, it's super high). So, can you gals please appear a bit short, a bit stupid, and a bit weak in front of us? We will definitely appreciate your kind heart.

Thursday, January 08, 2009

Teman-Teman Saya Memang Unik (part 3)

Kadang bingung juga yah punya temen yang:

1. Cowok autis penyuka masak dan bercocok tanam
2. Bitchy Banci, seksualitasnya diragukan, penggemar felem bokep gay
3. Haram muharam. Spesialis gaya menjijikan saat dipoto
4. Babi hamil --> lebih haram soalnya hamil di luar nikah
5. Jayus --> Well, ini yang paling normal setelah saya

Teman-teman saya memang unik. Saya sih normal-normal sajah ^^

An Evening at The Daily Mass

As I was about to stand to read the bible at the church, I looked at the churchgoers. It was my first time becoming a lector (person who reads the bible, hymn, and the Alleluia). I have done lots of public speaking in the past, so I was not too nervous (of course, the nervous feeling was still there). I prayed to God to give me a calm heart, so my voice later won't shake too much. So that even if I feel nervous, people won't be able to see it.

Then I heard God said to me.

"Ben, thanks so much for volunteering your time. I am very proud of you, but remember, this is MY "show", not YOURS."


What was I thinking? I only thought of doing well in the bible reading, so I could speak clearly and ultimately, WOWed the people with my perfect English. Is that even important at all? This is a mass, and at mass, God's name is glorified, not my name.

As I stood, I prayed to God again, but this time was different. "God, I prayed so that Your words I am going to read can touch people's hearts and lives."

I was still nervous and my hands were shaking, but I know in my heart, I have done my best and I am sure God knows it.

Anyways, this is the bible passage I read.

A reading from the first letter of St John

We are to love,
because God loved us first.
Anyone who says, ‘I love God’,
and hates his brother,
is a liar,
since a man who does not love the brother that he can see
cannot love God, whom he has never seen.
So this is the commandment that he has given us,
that anyone who loves God must also love his brother.

Whoever believes that Jesus is the Christ
has been begotten by God:
and whoever loses the Father that begot him
loves the child whom he begets.
We can be sure that we love God’s children
if we love God himself and do what he has commanded us;
this is what loving God is –
keeping his commandments;
and his commandments are not difficult,
because anyone who has been begotten by God
has already overcome the world;
this is the victory over the world –
our faith.

The word of the Lord.

God loves you, and me, and them.

Gosip yuk gosip....

"Eh lu tahu gak Vi kalau si Mayang jadian ama si Bambang?"

"Ihhh... yang bener luuuu? Masak sih???"

"Lu kayak gak tahu reputasi gue, emang gue pernah salah bikin gosip?"

"Ya gak pernah sih, tapi gila aja yahh masak si Mayang mau ya sama si Bambang."

"Biasa aja lah, si Mayang paling juga bentar lagi bosen pacaran ama si Bambang."

"Gimana lu bisa tahu? SOTOY yah?"


.... *speechless*

"Eh, terus nurut lu apa yang bikin si Mayang mau pacaran sama si Bambang kalau dia tahu kalau Bambang itu pecinta pria?"


... *speechless*

"Ah, cowok tajir macem Bambang mah banyak non, mana perlu cari yang udah pasti hombreng??"


Buat teman-teman sayah inisial T, Y, dan I, happy gossiping gals! =P

NB: Daripada menggosip, gue sih pilih digosipin saja. Gosipin gih gue dengan Angelina Jolie, biar harga stock gue naik setelah rendah banget gara-gara financial crisis.

Tuesday, January 06, 2009

A Cuppa Earl Grey Tea in The Morning

I used to think that in life, there are only 2 options:
- I get what I want by default
- I get what I want by effort

You know the similarity? Yup, I get what I want, exactly the way I want it. When? When I want it.

However, as I grow older, I realize one thing.

Sometimes in life we need to wait. Success doesn't come overnight, character is not built in one day, and love doesn't grow in one or two movie sessions.

Sometimes we wait and wait and wait, and nothing happens. That's called fate my friend. We are just not meant to have that thing, and that's okay. When we look back, don't you realize... How much have we grown in strength and personality as the result of waiting? For me, that's a lot. A LOT. A LOT.

*Thanks to some of the people in my past, I now believe that BITCHES do exist, thanks to you*

Quoting Steve Jobs, life can only be understood backwards, but it can be done only forwards. How true is that?

For me at the moment, as part of my New Year's resolution, I want to listen to my inner voice more. Sometimes, somehow I already know that something shouldn't be done and when I did that, my inner voice shouted, cried, and objected. However, I still did it. I was not happy after doing that thing. I think God (or whatever your higher power is) has already put that inner voice to guide us, to do "supposed to be the right thing", and we might end up doing the right thing (or probably not).

But don't you realize, when we follow our heart, we are happier?

Monday, January 05, 2009

I Cooked!!!

Yes, I finally cooked something for the first time since... last year? *can't remember, too long already*
None of my family members is gifted with cooking skill, so it's not my fault to be a terrible cook =D
Nevertheless, we finally managed to cook something.

Yay, so excited!!!

A proud us

Our masterpiece - black pepper chicken. I know it doesn't look very pretty, but it does taste delicious

supposed to be Foo Yung Hai

Getting fatter after eating - who cares??!

Lady boss and her two bodyguards

Nasty pose

If you worry about my health after eating those foods, don't worry, I am still alright haha....

Marriage Test Drive

My friend and I finally have something really in common, we say Yes! to Marriage Test Drive. Woot!

Before we buy a car, we always do a Test Drive, to know the car condition better. Of course the car salesman can easily describe about the car in detail, but the best way to understand the car is to sit on it, drive it a few rounds. Why? Because that's what we are going to do with the car - driving it.

However, the supposed-to-be smartest species on earth created something funny called marriage. They put 2 humans in one cage called a house, and hopefully they can live together forever happily ever after. And soon after the $15,000 Europe honeymoon, the wife will shout "I CAN'T BELIEVE I MARRY AN ASSHOLE!!!!" and the husband will continue watching soccer on TV - "Oh Whatever, You think I care, you obese gorilla?".

Sounds familiar?

I know countless of cases of divorce just because the couple don't think they are made for each other. And the sad thing is... the husband and wife just realize about that AFTER their marriage (of course, otherwise they won't call it divorce, silly me.)

And you know the best part? The couple realize that they are not meant to be together just DAYS, or probably MONTHS after they get married.

That leads me to the advantage of Marriage Test Drive - to know whether we should be together in the first place. If after the Marriage Test Drive we simply can't live together, no hard feeling - move on, life goes on. It's as simple as that.

Wait... probably some of you will argue with me. Why can't we just have dating? We can know each other also... Well, I wish. But the reality is... the person we see at the other side of restaurant table is not the same as the person who lives, sleeps, and cooks at home. Come on, although I believe in dating we should be ourselves, how many of us are really "ourselves" with all our bad habit like eating with sound, not walking straight and such. At least in dating we try to be "us at our best" if not being another person altogether. And we all know, faking something is tiring. We can't fake all the time - 20, 30, 40 years down the road. One day, a bastard will be tired to pretend to be a gentleman.

So... why not spending probably 6 months together in one house or maybe 1 room... to see whether we should go further into marriage or not. Some people will still be able to fake themselves for 6 straight months (they should win an Oscar, or at least be nominated for it). However, for most of us, 6 month-period is just too long not to be ourselves, and ultimately, we can see each other's character at the very core.

And living together will definitely portray another matter - SEX (OK, don't be a hypocrite). Well, I will leave it to each individual, whether the so-called Test Drive will include this or not. I personally feel that sex should be done after marriage.

What do you think? :)

Sunday, January 04, 2009

I Wanna Wake Up With You

I wanna wake up with you
I wanna be there when you open your eyes
I want you to be
The first thing that I see(yeah)
I wanna wake up with you

I wanna lay by your side
I wanna feel every beat of your heart
throughout the night
I wanna hold you tight (yeah)
I wanna wake up with you

All the love inside me has been sleeping
Waiting for the right one to come along
You can share the love that I've been keeping, baby
You can put the music to my song

I wanna wake up with you
I wanna reach out and know that you're there
I want you to be
The first thing that I see (yeah)
I wanna wake up with you

i want you to be
the first thing i see(yeah)
'cuz i wanna wake up with you

all the love inside me has been sleeping
waiting for the right one to come along
you can share the love that i've been keeping , baby
you can put the music to my song

i wanna wake up with you
i wanna reach out and know that your there
i want you to be
the first thing that i see, (yeah)
i wanna wake up with you

i want you to be
the first thing that i see(yeah) repeatx2

Majorly Infatuated With: The Duchess and Keira Knightley

I think in Hollywood, there 2 types of beauty. First, is the "sexy, naughty, bitchy" kinda beauty, and it's easy to give examples: Angelina Jolie, Paris Hilton, Pam Anderson.

The second type of Hollywood beauty is the classic beauty, and I won't hesitate to propose Keira Knightley as the leading authority. I am struggling to find the other examples. Well, Nicole Kidman? Kate Winslet?

Anyways, I don't think Saul Dibb could ever find better actor than Ms Knightley when it comes to acting as a princess. She is stunningly beautiful and classy. I never find History lesson to be very interesting, but thanks to this film I now think History is actually quite interesting.

The story is about a duchess who was struggling whether she would choose her true love or remained married with the duke and raised her children. Finally, she did what every good mother should do: Children come first.

I think if she were to leave her family and choose to pursue what her mother called as "instant gratification", she would be called selfish and such. I know some of you might disagree with me and saying that we should by all means pursue our true love. But I think life is about striking the best possible solution in imperfect circumstances. Sometimes we need to sacrifice something so that everyone ultimately will be benefited, and Georgiana did just that. She was able to raise her children and Charles Grey became Prime Minister.

Digging deeper, I reflected that some people were born with the silver spoon, like Duke of Devonshire. Some people work his way up and ultimately become Prime Minister like Charles Grey. It's not what you were born as, it's what you choose to be.

Saturday, January 03, 2009

Enaknya jadi Babi

Zaman sudah berubah, semenjak pemerintah mengesahkan undang-undang perbabian di Indonesia dan sekitarnya.

Dahulu kala saat saya masih muda *uhuk uhuk...*, babi cuman dipekerjakan, dimakan, dan kadang-kadang diperkosa kalau ada orang yang sudah ngebet dan tidak ada manusia atau binatang lain yang lebih menggairahkan.

Namun sekarang sudah nggak lagi bung.. Babi juga manusiaaaaaa (lho?)
Babi sekarang kerjaannya: Tidur, makan, shopping, dan pergi nge-gym kalau sudah gendut.

Enaknya jadi babi!

Life is beautiful....................... hoammmm tidur lagi yah ngantukk zzzzzzzz grok grok grok nguik nguik nguik