Sunday, November 05, 2006

My Priorities in Life

These weeks are like hell for me. I have to work from dead morning till evening, and have to attend a lot of meetings. I always thought I can manage my time well, but I just found out at the end of the day that I am always extremely exhausted. Maybe it’s a clear sign that I just do too much...

Being a vice president of International Games, an Olympic-like event in my university, where all the students compete in sport and grouped according to their countries, make me have to stretch my mind a lot, think and strategize many aspects of that event. I am also a program director of Ministerial Forum, Business Manager of Indo-NTU Year Book, Public Relation Officer of Overseas Expedition Program (We will be going to Myanmar to volunteer this June), a volunteer at a boys’ hostel, and as a badminton captain.

However, being able to accomplish so much is not without trade-off. I only sleep 5 to 6 hours a day during weekdays. That’s really a challenge for me who adore sleeping and eating :D

What are my priorities in life? That’s a question that I always ask myself when I am exhausted. Finally, I spent my precious Sunday night to think about it. Study and work come first. Organization stuffs come second. Inside organization stuffs, I am always very clear that International Games top the rest of my organization activities.

Friends and family are also extremely important for me. I am willing to spend hours of my time to enjoy quality time with my friends. Even after that, I have to cut my relax time into half.

Reading is my past time favorite. I used to finish at least 1 200-page book every week, but I don’t have time to read anymore. Currently I force myself to read a book titled “Time Power” by the famous Brian Tracy.

Badminton is the only sport I love passionately since I was 8. But with my busy schedule, I find that going to gym is much more efficient and less time consuming. It’s only 1 hour compared to 3 or 4 hours of badminton. I am proud to say that despite my tight schedule, I can always find time to go to gym twice a week. Who doesn’t fancy Brad Pitt-like body anyway?

Church? I am always touched every time I read stories about people who place church and other religious activities in top of their other activities. But I don’t want to be hypocrite to say that I am a very religious person. I just haven’t reached that level. I attend mass every week, and read bible everyday, but that’s the only time when I can feel an angelic-halo around my head.

Am I doing too much? Only time can answer this question. But for now, I just try to enjoy every second of my life and experience how to be a person whose time is measured by minute, not hour.

Friday, August 18, 2006

Losing Weight is Damn Easy!!!

I wonder, why slimming pills company can survive and even make big bucks all the time, if slimming down is almost effortless, at least for me.

I spent the first 20 years of my life overweight (a lot, by the way), trying to consume some “natural” slimming pills for 3 times at least (which absolutely only burn my cash, not my fat), and only find the “secrets” of losing weight and fat 3 months ago.

And it is not only about losing weight and fat. I gain some also. I gain abundant energy to wake up at 6.20 everyday and sleep after midnight, run 3 km in a straight, hit the gym 2 or 3 times a week without failing.

It works for me very well. I believe it works for guys also (I dunno how about girls).

If you are interested to find out more, send $100 to my bank account and let me explain it to you by phone. Hahaha, I am joking. My “secrets” are so simple that I dun even find it appropriate to call them “secrets”.

The first secret is nothing to do with exercises. It is inside your head. Your way of thinking will affect how well you will do in your slimming down program. If you think that losing 10 kg of your weight is as impossible as waiting for Paris Hilton to come to your house and saying, “Please marry me...”, you lose already. If you think that you are “destined” to be fat and ugly and sick and lonely and miserable, you wish will be granted.
Everyone has the right to be as fit as Ronaldinho or Yao Ming. Get an amazing abs like Brad Pitt or Janet Jackson. It depends on you whether you want to take your right or not.

The second secret is about dieting. It is so simple than I even remember it better than my own cell phone number (which I forgot twice so far).
My Eating Plan.
7 am good breakfast (1 bread and 1 serving of low fat milk)
11am snack (fruit only, no bread or noodle, and by the way, durian is definitely a stupid choice)
1 pm lunch (50% less rice)
4 pm snack (again, fruit only)
7 pm dinner (80% less rice), and I add 400ml of milk if I hit the gym.
I never say it is easy anyway. It is just simple.

The third secret is about exercising. It is also simple.
Cardio exercise – twice a week. 20 minutes in total. It is like running on the treadmill, but using different running plan. 2 minutes walking, 17 minutes cardio, 1 minutes cool down. During the 17 min cardio, I alternate between slow jogging and fast running, 1 minute each.
Gym. There are a lot of gym books outside there. Read one and follow religiously. I usually do 2 or 3 times a week.
Badminton. A passionate badminton player like me will find nothing more enjoyable and relaxing as this sport. I can play a non-stop 6 hours of heavy badminton training. But during Industrial Attachment, I limit myself to 2 hours.

I am now progressing from 2-digit kilogram overweight 3 months ago to 1-digit overweight now (TOTAL LOST = EIGHT KG). And I am still want to slim down 4 more kg by the end of October (By the way, you can’t expect you can slim down at the same rate all the time. You will eventually experience a decreasing rate after slim down a lot). I never feel more confident than now to reach that.

Saturday, July 15, 2006

Juventus, U'll Never Never Never Walk Alone!!

My deepest sympathy from the bottom of my heart for Juventus ( for the announcement that this club has been demoted to Serie B. I am not shock at all despite the greatness this club and all its players show. The fact that 5 players of Juventus represented Italy and 3 represented France in World Cup 2006 final is clear enough to show that this club is one of the best in the world, if not the best, with or without all the scandals.

I personally believe that this is the time for Juventus’ players and fans around the world to prove their loyalty to our one and only beloved football club.
Juventus, U’ll never never never walk alone. I am behind you, always.

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

David Beckham versus Steven Gerrard

Both are incredibly talented, charismatic, somehow good looking.

David Beckham
- rich (who disagree?). He used to be the richest footballer in this planet. Now Ronaldinho takes place that position despite his look (kiddin' :D)
- handsome. I am not gay, but everyone can tell that he has a face that most men will envy. Unless u are Brad Pitt of course.
- famous. Maybe he is not the best footballer in the world, but he is definitely the most famous one.
- happy. I somewhat feel that this point is rather controversial. Anyway.. who is happier than a rich man with beautiful (and famous) wife and three children?

Steven Gerrard
- Loyal. Liverpool fans out there, thanks GOD. While his ex-teammate, Michael Owen decided to leave Liverpool for Real Madrid, he insisted to be in Liverpool. The next year, Gerrard get the reason why Owen left Liverpool, Champion League trophy.
- Energetic and Passionate. If you see Steven Gerrard play, u will see a young man full of passion and energy (even after the Italian giant, AC Milan had scored 3 goals and Liverpool had not scored anything)
But even wikipedia dun say anything about his personal life.

However, for me, Steven Gerrard is definitely more capable than David Beckham (and John Terry and Joe Cole and Frank Lampard and Michael Owen etc) to be the next England National Team captain. England needs more than just David Beckham to be its captain. What it needs is a more energetic, passionate player. And Steven Gerrard definitely suits that position. I am definitely not very objective because I am one of Gerrard' fans, but maybe 3 or 4 years from now, Sven Goran Ericksson's successor will thank me for writing this blog :D

Friday, June 16, 2006

World Cup 2006 - Where Legends Are Born

All football lovers will find themselves in heaven these months.
Last May, there was Champions League final, where Barcelone beat 10-man Arsenal. I support neither Barcelona nor Arsenal. Juventus is the only football club I love.

And now, one of the largest sport events in the world takes place in Germany. World Cup ve just begun last week.

I support England as my favourite team. Despite its bad luck since tens of years ago, I am still very confident that England will win this year's World Cup. It has some of the best players in the world. It has very strong midfielders like Steven Gerrard (the soul of Liverpool), Frank Lampard (the magnificient of Chelsea, together with John Terry, also english-man), and the famous David Beckham (they are absolutely an excellent pair). However, I still hope that Wayne Rooney will find no difficulty coping with his injury. He is definitely a superb striker, much better than Michael Owen, and Peter Crouch (the last no need to mention :D)

My Prediction

Quarter = Germany vs Netherlands, England vs Argentina, Czech vs France, Brazil vs Spain
Semifinal = Germany vs England, Czech vs Brazil
Final = England vs Brazil
Winner = England!!
R-up = Brazil
3rd place = Czech
4th place = Germany

However, I still hope that South Korea can defeat Spain in the last 16, to advance to quarter. Then defeat Brazil in quarter final and Czech in semi-final.
So, England versus Korea in the final.. Hmm.. tough decision to make :D

Thursday, June 15, 2006

Indonesian = late (always) ??

I can't find any better title for my post today.

Last night, I made appointment with one of my close friends at 11 am today. We planned to meet a professor for some matters.
I wake up at 10.15 (went to bed at 1, what a pig.)
Then I took a shower.
Then I drank my fave drink, a cuppa hot green tea.
Then I read my bible (I read it everyday).
Then I browsed internet (I browsed internet every hour). That stupid Germany team found themselves lucky after scoring a goal at injury time.

At 10.55 am, I sent a sms to my friend, to ask where was he.
But no answer.

At 11.30, no answer. I started to curse him
At 12, again, no answer. I dunno what to do. I started to get sleepy again. When I got nothing to do, sleep is always a good (and healthy) activity to do.
At 12 something, I slept already. What a healthy pig.

Then at 1.30 pm, there is a SMS in my phone, disturbing my very good sleep. Sh*t!

"Dimana kamu??" (where are you?? - Indonesian).

I dunno what to reply. He was late for almost 3 hours and sent a super short sms without saying sorry, and the worst part is, he disturbed my sleep. That's unforgivable.

It's not the first time he was late. Maybe this is the 20th or 30th or 40th. I dunno. For me, 5 minutes late is late and that's terrible.

Almost every saturday morning, I played badminton. I usually make appointment at 8.30 am with my (indonesian) friends. But I always look stupid by standing alone in the middle of badminton courts, find noone there.

Then at 9, one of my friend comes. He is the first one. Thanks GOD.

Then at 10, one sms comes. Asking wheter I am still in the badminton court.

Then at 11, one sms comes. Saying sorry that he can't come because of bla bla bla. I think he saved that sentence in his template message so that he can send it when needed.

Then at 12, I finish playing badminton, realizing that the most enthusiastic person last nite never appears.

I wonder so many times. Is INDONESIAN always LATE? Actually I am quite paiseh (embarrassed) to say that. I myself is Indonesian (at least until 5 or 6 years from now).

Does GOD plant a DNA to every Indonesian to always be late? Which is very unlikely.

Then why?

I ve make appointment with singaporeans, indians, china chinese, ang moh (caucasian), vietnamese, etc etc. They are seldom late (at least they are better than indonesian, a lot.)

I have to be honest. Sometimes I am late also. But I always have a very strong reason for that. And I will feel very guilty when that happens.

This is a joke I read in internet not very long time ago.

American : why are u late?
Indonesian : because I am indonesian.

And there is an (indonesian) hypocrite writing comment.. Hey sir, that's insulting. U are stereotyping everyone bla bla bla.

Why not just say one word, sorry.. That's definitely better by far.

I am not stereotyping. I just make a very logical conclusion of a statistical population after observing a lot of samples.

Saturday, June 10, 2006

A wallet miracle.. A real story, guaranteed!!

Who said that miracle only happens on story books or best-seller fiction? It does happen everywhere, It does happen for anyone, including me.

Yesterday I just come back home from school when it started to rain. I ran very quickly so that I dun realize when I dropped my wallet. Actually that wallet is quite heavy. There are some paper money, coins, cards, etc. If it is not raining, I think I will know when the wallet dropped.

I reached my room at about 7.30 pm, and I browsed some website after that just to kill the time. At around 8, I decided to sleep because I want to watch World Cup opening match at night. I wake up at around 9.30 after getting some "bad dream". I dreamed that I lost my wallet. I was so panic when I wake up. I searched that wallet everywhere in my room but can't find it. Then I remembered that I went to toilet in hall 8 before reaching my room. Then I decided to run to that place, but again, I can't find that wallet. I was sooo sad, sooo panic. I don't know what to do anymore. I am not very healthy last night (and still not very healthy now), but I just don't care about anything but my wallet. Finally I decided to call SAO to block my matriculation card and OCBC to block my ATM card. But before I do that, I just got a strange feeling that I must go to search for my wallet one more time. I trust my feeling more than anything else in this world (except my GOD of course), so I go down to hall 8 toilet one more time. I feel so frustated. Until finally, I decided to let that wallet go and pray for GOD. I promise GOD to give $10 donation if I can find my wallet (By the way, my wallet and everything inside worth around $200). And u guess what happened next?? MIRACLE! I find my wallet just outside my hall, in the road. Thanks GOD it was raining so noone noticed that there is a wallet there, expect me of course :D
I feel so relieved after I found that wallet. Thanks GOD..

And today, I donate $10 to my church.

Sunday, June 04, 2006

Results come out.. Arghhh...

This week my heart beats 3 times faster than usual. Two important results come out; exam and IA allocation. On Monday night, after going back from KL (Kuala Lumpur), one of the WORST trips EVER, my result for this semester came out. I am disappointed, honestly. I study as hard as last semester, but my result is a lot worse. It is OK actually, but i just think that i deserve more, much more.

But at least, I don't have a terrible weekend full of tears after I see my IA (Industrial Attachment) allocation result. I got my 2nd choice, which is Philips Electronics. Actually I applied Motorola as my 1st choice, but nevermind, I am quite happy to get Philips for my IA place. It is quite near to my place and the pay is also good (that's the most important think :P)

I don't know whether I should smile or cry, but I think I ve given my very best and I should be satisfied with all my results. I believe that all those results are the best for me, given by GOD and He has a very beautiful plan for my life. Maybe 30 or 40 years from now, u will understand why u have such a unique life, not the same with others, and not the same with what u expect. Life is like that, it can only be understood backward, but It can only be done forward.

Saturday, May 20, 2006

My EID..

After having exams for around 1 month (that’s terrible!), finally I can take a deep breath. Exam is over, although Result is not out, yet. I ve given my very best and I will be satisfied, no matter how my result is.
Now, it’s time to party… No!! I still have EID (Engineering Innovation and Design). Basically in this project, we are assigned to innovate an engineering product. We do everything. Yes, everything. We brainstorm the idea (which is really tiring), think about its mechanism and configuration (I dun really understand the meaning of those words, but as an engineer-wannabe, I have to use those words really often :D), make the prototype, think about how are we going to market that product, write reports, set booth, and present our idea. As a student of “world-class university”, we have to be able to do those works :P

Besides doing our projects, we have to attend several modules also. Actually I chose Material selection module as my elective. However, because there was one new member in our group, and she chose the same module as me, I have to change module. I don’t know what’s going on, until finally, my elective changed “automatically” to mechatronics. I was really shocked with that! That module sounds “chim” (hokkien word for difficult). That module needs programming and I am not very good at programming. I have asked everyone, beg them (not that pathetic lah :P) to change module with me, but noone is willing to do that. All of us feel that that module is really difficult and noone dared to take that module. And finally, someone who had to take that module is…. Me, thank you! T_T

However, I am a very optimistic person (I dun force you to believe me, after reading my previous paragraph :P), I believe that nothing is too difficult for me to handle. I believe that nothing is out of my boundary (quoting Rebecca, runner-up of The Apprentice 4).
If you are afraid of something, the best way to eliminate your fear is... by facing it. I am not kidding at all. That’s true. I always say to myself “Dun be afraid, u will be alright.”
And I am alright. I can complete my module in 4 days, instead of the time allowed, that’s 5 days.

After completing my last assignment well, I feel extremely satisfied. I enter my mechatronics lab with no background knowledge. I even dunno what the difference between analog and digital signal is. I only have one thing… an attitude to learn. That’s it. And that attitude makes me able to overcome anything. Yes, you read it correctly. Anything!

I still have 3 weeks to complete my project. But I believe that we are capable to complete our project extremely well. If you, my team-mates, happen to read my blog, I wanna say, I am proud of you and together we can do it! Jia you!!

Thursday, April 06, 2006

Happy Birthday to Myself =)

Today is an extremely important day for me because today I have completed my registration to join club 20's. Yeah.. Today I am 20 years old already. So happy but in the same time feeling so sad. Because when u are 20 years and older, you are an adult, and u are expected to take responsibility for whatever u do. I believe in that. I can't be so moody like a teenager. I have to be able to control my emotion and my action. And also control my anger (which is very difficult for me to control).

Btw, last midnight, I celebrated my birthday with my friends. It is a very simple and short celebration (less than 1 hour), yet it is very meaningful for me. We just ate pizza and a bit of talk and took photo together. That's all. And of course like most of my friends' birthday, the guests give testimonial to someone who celebrates his/her birthday. And I did receive some testimonials. I really appreciate those. Thanks guys.. I promise to improve myself better in the future.

And in my birthdays (beside new years and new semesters), I always make some resolutions to improve myself.
1. To Improve my relationships with my family and friends.
2. To Improve my relationship with my God and savior, Jesus Christ. And rely more on Him.
3. To be able to control my emotion, feeling, anger, and mood.
4. To excel in my study and in my IA (Industrial Attachment).
5. To gain confidence in myself which somehow eroded these years
6. To think more positively and not to grumble when I face problems.
7. To be a stronger person.
8. To learn to love a person in a better way.
9. To do a diet in a healthy way. In the same time improve my level of fitness.
10. To smile more =)

Those resolutions are not by order of importance. They are all important for me. I will do my very best to achieve those resolutions.

OK.. and finally.. happy birthday to myself. Wish me a very good luck! =)

Monday, March 20, 2006

Motivational Words Work!!

I like (oh no, LOVE!) reading motivational words. It helps me to cope with my study, give me new insight of life and make me feel good. Unfortunately, there is no such a thing as universally true motivational sentence, meaning to say, a particular motivational sentence may change someone's life but maybe it is just another sentence in another file in someone's computer memory. But for me especially, spending time to read and think about some motivational words everyday keeps me motivated and can achieve more and more. These are some motivational words that I like.

Motivation will almost always beat mere talent

The world can only be grasped by action, not by contemplation...The hand is the cutting edge of the mind.

It is time for us to stand and cheer for the doer,the achiever, the one who recognizes the challenge and does something about it.

Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal.

Character is like a treeand reputation like its shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing.

Too many people overvalue what they are not and undervalue what they are.

The tragedy in life doesn't liein not reaching your goal.The tragedy lies in having no goal to reach.

Victory belongs to the most persevering.

Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.

Success is never final.Failure is never fatal.

I think a hero is an ordinary individual who finds strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles.

The difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather a lack of will.

The secret of joy in work is contained in one word -- excellence. To know how to do something well is to enjoy it.

Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.

It is a rough road that leads to the heights of greatness.

Success is how high you bounce when you hit bottom.

Success will not lower its standard to us.We must raise our standard to success.

A successful man is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks that others throw at him.

A man is not finished when he is defeated. He is finished when he quits.

Yesterday is a cancelled check;Tomorrow is a promissory note;Today is the only cash you have,so spend it wisely.

How you spend your time is more important than how you spend your money. Money mistakes can be corrected, but time is gone forever.

One of the most tragic things I know about human nature is that all of us tend to put off living. We are all dreaming of some magical rose garden over the horizon - instead of enjoying the roses that are blooming outside our windows today.

One of the most tragic things I know about human nature is that all of us tend to put off living. We are all dreaming of some magical rose garden over the horizon - instead of enjoying the roses that are blooming outside our windows today.

Most look up and admire the stars. A champion climbs a mountain and grabs one.

The middle of every successful project looks like a disaster.

Successful and unsuccessful people do not vary greatly in their abilities. They vary in their desires to reach their potential.

Unless you try to do something beyond what you have already mastered, you will never grow.

Success is not measured by what a man accomplishes, but by the opposition he has encountered and the courage with which he has maintained the struggle against overwhelming odds.

I cannot give you a formula for success, but I can give you the formula for failure - which is: try to please everybody.

Don't measure yourself by what you have accomplished, but by what you should have accomplished with your ability.

The most extraordinary thing about the oyster is this. Irritations get into the shell... And when he cannot get rid of them, he uses the irritations to do the loveliest thing an oyster ever has the chance to do. If there are irritations in our lives today, there is only one prescription: make a pearl - And it takes faith and love to do it.

The bold-typed sentences are amongst my favourite quotes. I ve read those sentences more than 20 times and I still love to read them. It doesn't mean than I am too weak to live my life. I know that I am a very tough person. But even the toughest person in the world ever feel down sometimes and that's when the motivational words work best. Happy trying! =)

Thursday, March 16, 2006

Let's Kiasu!

When u see our beloved library and reading room are full with frustated people studying there, yes u are right. Exam is coming soon. My first exam is starting in 25 days.
For me, one semester here can be divided into 3 terms. The first term is the first 5 weeks in a semester. It is a very nice period for me to relax and no need to bother about study. I just go to lectures and tutorials (and sometimes, I said sometimes, skip them). Weekends (Friday nite-Saturday-Sunday) are always nice because I can enjoy my life (Actually I enjoy every second of my life, but u know, u can't always see the meaning of a sentence by read it once).
The second term is week 6 to 8. It is called a transitional term. It is when I start to panic and write some motivational words in my lecture notes in order not to sleep in lecture and study hard. It is time to repent all my sins during the first 5 weeks.
The last and the most scary term is week 9 onwards. It is time when I start hogging chair in reading room and library and I start to buy instant coffee after saturday church mass. It is time when I thank God if my computer crash so I can't waste my precious time surfing internet.

And now is week 10. I still have a lot of subjects to catch up especially Engineering Graphics, Electronics, Manufacturing, and my Prescribed Electives (It means almost all the subjects I take this semester T_T). The only subject I am quite confident with is Mathematics. I don't need to worry because I got an A+ for math last semester (you see, people like to emphasize their strength :D).

Everytime I am studying for exam, I always write a goal, what grades I have to achieve for my subjects. Sometimes I can achieve it, sometimes I can't. But if I set goal, It means I have to study hard to achieve that goal. Here is my goal for this semester.

Subject Result
MP2004 Manufacturing A
MP2005 Fluid A+
MP2006 Mathematics 4 A+
MP2008 Electronics A
MP2011 Engineering Graphics A
MP2071 Laboratory A-
CPE810 Resolving and Managing Conflict A-

Maybe I set the goal too high? Hahaha.. no lah. I believe that I can achieve that goal if I study hard for my exam. Jia you Benny.. Jia you..!!

"Dream to reach the sky. If you fail, you can still reach the cloud." - anonymous

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

tired?? read this!!

God: Hello. Did you call me?
Me: Called you? No. Who is this?
God: This is GOD. I heard your prayers. So Ithought I will Chat .
Me: I do pray. Just makes me feel good. I amactually busy now. I am inthe midst of something.
God: What are you busy at? Ants are busy too.
Me: Don't know. But I can't find free time. Life hasbecome hectic. It'srush hour all the time.
God: Sure. Activity gets you busy. But productivitygets you results.Activity consumes time. Productivity frees it.
Me: I understand. But I still can't figure out. By theway, I was notexpecting YOU to buzz me on instant messagingchat.
God: Well, I wanted to resolve your fight for time,by giving you someclarity. In this net era, I wanted to reach youthrough the Medium youare comfortable with.
Me: Tell me, why has life become complicatednow?
God: Stop analyzing life. Just live it. Analysis iswhat makes itcomplicated .
Me: Why are we then constantly unhappy?
God: Your today is the tomorrow that you worriedabout yesterday. Youare worrying because you are analyzing.Worrying has become your habit. That's why youare not happy.
Me: But how can we not worry when there is somuch uncertainty?
God: Uncertainty is inevitable, but worrying isoptional .
Me: But then, there is so much pain due touncertainty...
God: Pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional.
Me: If suffering is optional, why do good peoplealways suffer?
God: Diamond cannot be polished without friction.Gold cannot bepurified without fire. Good people go through trials,but don't suffer.With that experience their life becomes better, notbitter.
Me: You mean to say such experience is useful?
God:?Yes. In every term, Experience is a hardteacher.She gives the test first and the lessons afterwards.
Me: But still, why should we go through suchtests?Why can't we be free from problems?
God: Problems are Purposeful Roadblocks OfferingBeneficial Lessons toEnhance Mental Strength. Inner strength comesfrom struggle andendurance, not when you are free from problems.
Me: Frankly in the midst of so many problems, wedon't know where we areheading...
God: If you look outside you will not know whereyou are heading. Lookinside. Looking outside, you dream.Looking inside, you awaken. Eyes provide sight.Heart provides insight.
Me: Sometimes not succeeding fast seems to hurtmore than moving In theright direction. What should I do ?
God: Success is a measure as decided by others.Satisfaction is a measure as decided by you.Knowing the road ahead ismore satisfying than knowing you rode ahead. You work with the compass. Let others work with the clock.
Me: In tough times, how do you stay motivated?
God: Always look at how far you have come ratherthan how far you haveto go. Always count your blessing, not what youare missing.
Me: What surprises you about people?
God: When they suffer they ask, "why me?" Whenthey prosper, they neverask "Why me?" Everyone wishes to have truth ontheir side, but few wantto be on the side of the truth.
Me: Sometimes I ask, who am I, why am I here. Ican't get the answer.
God: Seek not to find who you are, but todetermine who you want to be.Stop looking for a purpose as to why you are here.Create it. Life isnot a process of discovery, but a process ofcreation.
Me: How can I get the best out of life?
God: Face your past without regret. Handle yourpresent with confidence.Prepare for the future without fear.
Me: One last question. Sometimes I feel myprayers are not answered.
God: There are no unanswered prayers. At timesthe answer is NO.
Me: Thank you for this wonderful chat. I am sohappy to start the NewDay with a new sense of inspiration.
God: Well. Keep the faith and drop the fear. Don'tbelieve your doubtsand doubt your beliefs. Life is a mystery to solve,not a problem toresolve. Trust me. Life is wonderful if you know how to live.

Tuesday, March 07, 2006

If you are an indonesian or u know intermediate bahasa indonesia, there is one blog that you should read. This blog is written by former Putri Indonesia (Miss Indonesia) 2001, Angelina Sondakh.
She is such a perfect women who has 4B's : Brain, Beauty, Behaviour, Blessed.
I am definitely a big fans of her =)

My Love Life (part 2)

Just after I wrote a post titled "My Love Life", a friend of me call me on MSN and give some comment to me. And during this week, I received some comments from my best friends or just someone-out-there who happen to read my blog. I am not a celebrity anyway, but I think it is very common among my friends and me to comment on each other. I am a very open-minded person and I am very open to any kind of comment no matter how discouraging that comment is. I am so surprised that most of them don't support my decision. They asked me why I gave-up so easily. Some of my friends asked me whether I still love that girl. I have to be honest that I still love her. I have to be honest that I am lonely without her although I am surrounded by a lot of people. I still miss our days together.

However, I have make up my mind. For me, give up means give up. It is the end of everything. And some friends said that I am a loser in love life? YES, I AM! However, at least I am a good loser. I know how to lose nicely and I am happy with that.

I am always proud of myself for being such a tough person. My life is still O.K. despite of all the problems in my love life. It is funny to see a lot of people feel so depressed because of love matter. STUPID! Life is not only about love, although you can't live without it.

I will survive... I know I will..

Monday, March 06, 2006

You Raise Me Up..

Listening to music is one of my hobbies. However, unless most of the people who like to listen to easy going, sweet, and crunchy kind of songs (my vocab is very strange sometimes :p), I judge the quality of the song by its meaning. I do like beautiful song, but some of them are rubbish in terms of lyrics and it's better for them to be played using instruments only.

However, this song titled "You Raise Me Up" by Josh Groban is both beautiful and meaningful. It's one of the best song I ve ever heard in terms of lyrics. I want so share with u some lines of that song (and for the rest, u can easily use google to search :p)

When I am down and, oh my soul, so weary
When troubles come and my heart burdened be
Then, I am still and wait here in the silence
Until you come and sit awhile with me

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders
You raise me up.. To more than I can be

Wow.. this song is incredible. Amazing! How true isn't it?
Do you remember one time when you feel very lethargic. You didn't feel like enjoy doing anything. You felt that all you ve done is really messy. You felt that people are watching you and waiting for you to make mistake and immediately laughing at you sarcastically. And the list goes on.

And suddenly you received a funny sms from ur best fren, or a send-to-10-people-or-u-will-get-bad-luck-for-10-years kind of mass E-mail. And you suddenly smiled and forgot all ur problems or maybe laugh very loud and all the people in the library stared at you (Dun worry, i did it twice :p). And because of that, u will remember ur fren's kindness for the rest of ur day and even still remember it while u were showering urself in the evening.

2 weeks ago, I become one of the commitee members of NTUSU Welfare Festival. This event is really grand. However, we really lack of man power for that event. That's why the commitee members have to work extra hard. After working for 12 hours almost without rest (see my post before titled "My All"), I felt that my effort has paid off only because of one statement given by one of the maincomms. He really thanked me sincerely for helping out the event and he said that he can't imagine how hard he will be working if I didn't help him. I was really impressed with him. He is one of the busiest person in that event. And his responsibility is much greater than me. Yet he still have time to thank me sincerely. That small thing differentiates the great leaders and so-so ones.

If you don't have time reading my long post, I just want to remind you that you will never be too small to brighten someone's day. It doesn't take much to do it. When you know that someone is very tired, give him/her one or two sentences of encouragement. I usually use these kind of sentences to cheer-up someone.

"I can understand how you feel. You must go thru a very hard time. But I know that u are a very tough person. I am very sure that u can overcome this successfully. Jia you.. "

Haha.. it's like "copy-paste" kind of sentence. But it helps.

Or if you find someone that help you with something, no matter how small it is, u can say..
"I really don't know how to thank you. You are a very busy person yet you still want to help me with this. I really appreciate your help."
Sounds nice right?

How if you really don't have 20 seconds to say that?
Smile and say "thank you" sincerely. It will cost you less than 5 seconds of your time and less than 10 kcal of your energy and you can still brighten someone's day.

"I will never allow people to come to me and leave me without feeling better" - anonymous

Friday, February 24, 2006

what hv u learned in life??

I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in.
I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just assholes.
I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.
I've learned that you can get byon charm for about fifteen minutes. After that, you'd better have abig weenie or huge boobs.
I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others - they are more screwed up than you think.
I've learned that you can keep puking long after you think you're finished.
I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, unless we are celebrities.
I've learned that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades, and there had better be a lot of money to take its place.
I've learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon and all the less important ones just never go away.

by = dun-know-and-dun-care-who-write-this

Thursday, February 23, 2006

My Love Life..

If I can change one particular part of my life, I will definitely consider love as one of the candidates. I can be very very quick in decide something (and very seldom regretting it). However, I am a very undecisive person in love matters. But finally, I ve decided to make an important decision today. I love a girl (I am sure she knows it), but after a lot of consideration, I decide to give up. If you (the girl I mention above) read this, I want to state that I have given up on you, officially from today. I am not the right person for you. If we love someome, we definitely try our best to make her happy. And I have failed to do that. The saddest part is, we are so close yet we are so far.
Thank you for accompanying me during one of the most difficult times in my life (whether you realize it or not).
I will be trying my best to forget my love for you (although I know it is very very hard).
If you face difficult time, you can still count on me. However, I will do it for friendship, not for love. Wish you the very best from now.

/I ve just realized that I was crying while typing. I look tough and independent outside but actually I am weak inside.

Malaysia Boleh!!

I ve just come back from one lovely trip to Malaysia during my recess term (actually I came back to Singapore last nite, but I was very tired to blog).
Here I want to share my experience there.

At 9.30 pm, we all gathered in Boonlay MRT. My 2 frens and I are among the last ones who arrived there.

After around 8 hours sitting in a "almost no space" train, we finally arrived in Kuala Lumpur (I am not very good in writing "how to get there" paragraph, so I will skip that part :p). We had breakfast at 7-11 store. After that, we bought tickets to go to Genting highlands and reached there at around 10 am. We took a nap for a while (actually we can't say 2 1/2 hrs as "a while"). Ronald, "our beloved tour leader" had a very difficult time to wake us up, because we almost didn't sleep the nite before in the "almost no space" train. And it's time to go shopping!! Window shopping has been my favourite since I was young (huh.. and I will join club 20's very soon). But who the hell likes shopping in hungryness? We did have lunch before. Paying almost RM 20 for a bowl of "instant noodle" and a glass of carrot juice sounds stupid, isn't it?

We spent our day in KL. KL is always a heaven for girls (and boys also to be honest). I am amazed with the high buildings there. Petronas was the highest building in the world, and we did visit it. But the "best" part is on the way back from KL to Genting. I sat beside a gay (of course I didn't know that he is a gay before) who "did something" to me (it is disgusting, really. I let u to imagine urselves what had happened to me). I was very shocked. It is a "memorable" experience :p
Do I have a look of a gay? T_T
However, here I want to make a confirmation that I am STRAIGHT and will be STRAIGHT FOREVER. So gays, please.. please.. understand that.

This is the best part of our trip. We played a lot of games in Genting. I played Roller-coaster and a lot of other games. Actually life is like a roller-coaster, sometimes we don't know what will happen to us. What we can do is only trying the enjoy every second of it. And as a christian, I do believe that no matter what happen to me (like no matter what happen to me while I am in roller-coaster), I will be alright.
And after that, we went back to Singapore with lots and lots of beautiful memories.

Friday, February 17, 2006

My All..

"When u work for 13 hours almost without break, without feeling tired, and you dun grumble, that's PASSION."

Yes, that is exactly what happened to me today. As part of my task as Business Manager and Logistics subcommitee for NTUSU Welfare Fest 2006 (the biggest and coolest event in NTU EVER), I have already given my very best for it. I dun work for ECA points (for what? I am a scholar anyway, no need to get so many ECA points). I work because I like to work. I work because I want to make the event successful. Too idealistic? Maybe. But I just do what I should do. That's it. And I am very very satisfied with my own work.

For the past 5 days, I work for the event for maybe around 40 hours. It is even more than 2 times all my classes (Actually I have 20 something classes every week, but I did skip some "not important" ones for that event.) I also slept for only around 5 hours a day for this event. U think I did not study so I can have luxury to sleep 8 hours a day?

Yeah, that's me. If I have committed to do something, I will give my very very best for it. And I can be sure that my work is very very well done. I am a perfectionist anyway. I believe, if we can make something perfect, why we should add some "cracks" in what we do. That's ridiculous.

And for sure, I will be applying for director of NTUSU Welfare Fest 2007 next year. I am still thinking what position I will apply. I have a lot of time to think anyway. But most probably it will be Business Manager, Logistics officer, or Program Manager. The last one is my first choice. This position is cool and I think I have the ability, ambition, and effort for that position. This year's Program manager for this year's Welfare Fest is very good actually, so she no need to compete with me for that position, she can apply for chairman position lah (I am serious, she has everything someone need to become a chairman). I learn a lot from this year's NTUSU Welfare Fest and I will learn everything needed to make me suitable for that position. I am a very hardworking person. I will strike big one day. I am very sure about it.

Friday, February 10, 2006

Learning From China

Last week I played badminton wif my Malaysian roomate, his malaysian frens and his china frens. So you can guess ah what language they spoke while playing badminton. Anyway, I enjoyed playing badminton wif them coz they are all above average players. I was wondering.. how come P.R.C (China) students like "appear everywhere". We can see them in Dean's list (top 5% of the students in one major). We can see them in list of IVPs (school players for sport). We can see them in commitee also. One of my maincommitee in NTUSU Welfare commitee is PRC student. How come? So strange leh..

If you like badminton, and you like to watch badminton match, you will get the answer straight away. Look how China players play. Last year I watched a match of China female double players, Gao Ling / Huang Sui (the last name I am not very sure how to spell) against I-dunno-and-dun-care players. The score was 14-3 for the I-dunno-and-dun-care players in the second set and The China players also lost in the first set. But the China players didn't look like they want to give up that match. They played patiently. For them, It was not the end of the game yet. Slowly but sure, they started to gain some points, and I can't imagine that finally they won 17-15. I thought such a story is just for best-seller novel or inspirational story. But the China players had proved me wrong. And the third set is for the China players. They won 15-5.

If you have chance to visit NTU in Singapore, try to visit our cozy reading rooms in every hall. Try to speak English with some of the students there. If you choose 5 students randomly and you can't find China students (you can know them very easily thru their English accent :p), you can call me and I will treat you a McD set meal for free ^^ Reading room is China students' favourite place. Maybe it's like cafe or shopping mall for them. They love books more than anything else in this world. They love studying and will get asthma if they don't study for 5 minutes. Hahaha, I am kidding lah of course. But really, they really love studying (most of them lah at least).

A lot of people are jealous with them. When a lot of students struggle to pass a subject, a China students can get a distinction quite easily (actually not very easy lah, refer to my previous paragraph). But the question is.. Are we willing to pay the price? Are we willing to spend our free time to study, or revise our lecture notes, or do tutorials? China students are willing to pay a very high price for their success, which a lot of students say "No, thanks." No wonder China students are among the best students here. Or maybe all over the world.

Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Hero - Mariah Carey

Mariah Carey is one of my favourite singers. She got the look, the voice, and everything someone need to stand amongst world's best entertainers. Her songs are always nice, charming, entertaining, and meaningful. One of my favourite is "Hero" which is a quite old song.

There's a hero
If you look inside your heart
You don't have to be afraid
Of what you are
There's an answer
If you reach into your soul
And the sorrow that you know
Will melt away
And then a hero comes along
With the strength to carry on
And you cast your fears aside
And you know you can survive
So when you feel like hope is gone
Look inside you and be strong
And you'll finally see the truth
That a hero lies in you
It's a long road
When you face the world alone
No one reaches out a hand
For you to hold
You can find love
If you search within yourself
And the emptiness you felt
Will disappear
And then a hero comes along
With the strength to carry on
And you cast your fears aside
And you know you can survive
So when you feel like hope is gone
Look inside you and be strong
And you'll finally see the truth
That a hero lies in you
Lord knows
Dreams are hard to follow
But don't let anyone
Tear them away
Hold on
There will be tomorrow
In time
You'll find the way
And then a hero comes along
With the strength to carry on
And you cast your fears aside
And you know you can survive
So when you feel like hope is gone
Look inside you and be strong
And you'll finally see the truth
That a hero lies in you

Yes, there is a hero inside each of us. I believe that. Sometimes we just want to say "Aiyohh.. I can't do it lah. This task is very difficult one." But actually we are stronger than what we think. We just need to awake our hero in ourself. That hero is called "BELIEVE". When we believe in something, our mind will focus on that thing. Like a laser who is able to cut metals. Henry Ford said "If you say you can or can't, you are right." How true isn't it?
When we think that we can't do something, our mind shuts down. It will keep telling us "U blind or what? You surely can't do it." And what happens next? Yes, our mind is right. We can't do it. Then we tell our mind "You are right lor.. I am too dumb to do this. Next time, no need to try. Surely fail one."
And the best part is, everytime we are facing the same problem, we are very sure that we can't face that problem, and again.. we are right. Vice versa.

So, everytime you think that you can't face your problem, remember Mariah Carey. She is always beautiful :D

Monday, January 30, 2006

A stranger...

Will u say no if a girl asks u to accompany her when she is asked to accompany a stranger walking around the city? Of course the answer is no (unless u are inhuman).
Yeah, that's exactly what happens wif me today. And the rest is history :D
OK, there is a stranger from Australia visiting Singapore for the first time. I dun noe how he got to know her (the girl I mentioned above). But finally, he asked her to accompany him travelling around the city. We (the stranger, my fren, and I) went to Orchard, Suntec City, Merlion, and finally come back to NTU. It is a very long and boring journey for me, because I visited those place just some days ago. My legs got tired very easily. And the worst part is, most of the shops still closed today. I like to do shopping (who doesn't like to spend money to buy something he likes?). And today I buy a Samuel & Kevin T-shirt that cost me $10. Good price actually. But yeah, that's the only stuff I can buy today.
After visiting Orchard, we went to Suntec City. We had our dinner at Fish & Co. It's my second time eating there since I come to Singaporebut I am still amazed with the ambiance there. It's not very luxurious. It is not heavely decorated. Just simple and sweet. But I don't know. I just feel very relax and comfortable sitting there. However, nothing is perfect in this world. The waiting time is long. I dun like waiting (who likes?).
After taking lots and lots of photos (100++ photos in one day!), we finally decided to go back. I slept in MRT (Yes, I did sleep there). I am really really tired.
However, I dun regret my precious 7-hours used to accompany that stranger. It's always nice to be nice to people.

vegetarian food rocks!!

I ve just come back from canteen 2. That canteen shud be awarded "the best of the best canteen in NTU forever."!
During Chinese New Year, when most of the canteens in NTU closed, vegetarian stall and sichuan cuisine stall at canteen 2 open, luckily. If not, I have to cook instant noodle (again!) for my lunch. My cooking skill is very poor. I can't even cook instant noodle properly. Maybe I shud look for a wife that can cook a lot of delicious foods hahaha.. :D
I had my lunch with 2 girls (they are my juniors here), after long time never eat together with both of them. Me so busy leh.. Got lots of assignments and commitee tasks. So I usually eat "da pao" (take away) in my room, alone! I am not very very introvert lah. But yeah.. sometimes I eat and check E-mail in the same time. You know, I am a very effective kind of person :p
Now It's really time for study. No choice lor. Tommorow is the last day of Chinese New Year holiday. And I still got lots of works to do. Jia you jia you..

Sunday, January 29, 2006

Gong Xi Fa Cai everyone...!!

Today, chinese people regardless of nationality celebrate Chinese New Year. This year is Puppy Year. I dun really understand what the year means and its impact on me. My family got chinese tradition and they do celebrate it every year. Elder (or married) people usually give Ang Pao (red envelope with money inside) to younger ones. And the fact is.. this year I cant get any single cent of Ang Pao because I dun go back to my home country, Indonesia. So sad leh..
I have just come back from Esplanade, seeing Fireworks. It is beautiful, really! Our eyes are pampered by such beautiful movement of fireworks and nice sound. I guess it lasted for more than 5 minutes. What a nice view.

I am still sick, but I think I get better now. After consuming lots and lots of water and vitamin C, I feel more energetic. Still got a bit of headache, but I am sure it will recover very soon. So I can study tommorow (yes, I said 2moro, not today ok..).

OK, now it's time to sleep... Sleeping is always nice for everyone.. Cya 2moro... :)

Friday, January 27, 2006

I am S.I.C.K

Today is Friday night. I have just finished watching my very nice Singapore drama called Love concierge starring Jacelyn Tay, Ann Mok, Fiona Xie, Thomas Ong, and many more.
And now I am sitting on my very lovely chair browsing internet lazily. Really lazy to do anything (esp. study). My condition is not very good now. Got infuenza. Maybe should take more vitamins. I am busy so sometimes I can't sleep enuff. Sometimes I got insomnia and wake up at 5 in the morning T_T And feel that I always lack of sleep. Tend to skip classes. When I am in a class attending lecture, I feel extremely bored and hope that the lecturers finish their lectures ASAP (that is now).
Maybe I should try to relax more. I have signed up for yoga class. And I have attended once. It helps sometimes, but sometimes it's just not enuff. I am just not patient enuff to do deep-breathing for a couple of minutes. Have I told u before that I am B.U.S.Y? Maybe I shud buy some medicine that will help me to relax INSTANTLY and help me to feel energetic when I attend lectures, or tutorial, or lab session, or study. Huhh..

And now with really a lot of used tissues in my table, I feel very very lonely. My roomate went to Malaysia for Chinese New Year and I have noone to talk to. MSN people sucks. They appear online but no answer when I call them.

Am I suffering from depression syndrom? I think I am O.K.
Well, not that O.K. lah, but at least it's not very terrible. I still can write in my very lovely blog. Dunno lah if the sentences all broken one.

After this, I am trying to study something, coz after CNY, surely there will be a lot of tests. And I just don't like to fail that tests. Failure sucks. So?? Study now lahh..!!

Thursday, January 26, 2006

What happened wif my life??

Today I do practically nothing. Attend lecture and tutorial... yes, that's it.
And I had wasted more than 5 hours doing rubbish. Chat, surf the internet, walk here walk there. Argghhhh... I feel really strange wif my life. It is just too strange to be true. What happened Benny??
Oh.. please... There is only about 4 hours before midnite and I have to finish my drawing assignment.. And I dun understand what is it about.
Lord, have mercy

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Energizing my day

Today I feel very energetic. I finished my lesson at 6.30 (and the last hour is lecture). After that, I went to SAC (Student Activities Center) for photo-taking session. I am NTUSU subcommer for 3 commitee. I arrived at SAC at 5.45 (u know, I am always on time :))
After having a dinner there (alone!!), I read my lecture notes to kill the time.
As a subcommer for 3 commitee, actually I am not very busy. Of course I do my job well lah.. but I just feel that my time is abundant. When you think that 24 hours a day is enough, It will be enough. Vice versa. Maybe I have to take more subjects next semester, or take part in more activities.

Yesterday, I was engaged in a deep thinking about my university life. It is so plain u know. I play badminton for my hall last holiday. Actually I wanted to be the captain for the badminton team in my hall. However, the maincomm chose my ex- roomate for that position. I think he is just not the right person. Well... his badminton skill is good lah.. (although I am better, honestly..). But He just don't have ability to be a captain. Poor leadership. Poor interpersonal skill. Poor decision-making skill. And the list goes on. We can't blame the maincomm. Who knows the captain's quality before. Just give a chance lah.. But he has failed to do his task pathetically. So pity. Hope the maincomm will choose a better captain next year to make our hall better. I, of course, will apply for that position again next year. I love my hall so much, and I will give the best for my hall.

Hope I will enjoy my hall life better.