Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Tuesdays with Benny (29 April) - Ask and You Shall Receive!

Since I am the Chief Writer of http://www.gratiworld.com/, and I have my own column there (Tuesdays with Benny), I am gonna post my article here as well. Please do support http://www.gratiworld.com/, that's indeed a very nice forum for people who want to learn how to be grateful with their life (not to mention, very cute bunny as its logo :D)

I found it amusing that people, especially Asians quite often don't ask for what they want. And they are wondering why people are not so supportive.

I receive countless of things as the result of simply asking. Last time when I needed some pocket money, I didn’t wait for the money to drop from the sky (although I really wish that will happen.). What I did was... I called a language centre, and I asked them whether they need someone to be their bahasa Indonesia tutor. They didn’t even advertise the position; I was the one who asked for it. Two weeks after that, I started teaching.

I bought a ticket for an event, but unfortunately, I couldn’t attend the event, so I must sell it to someone. I put it on ebay, but no one was interested. Instead of just giving up, I sent some sms-es to my friends who might be interested. As the result, I managed to sell the ticket to my friend. I never knew that he really wanted to go to the event until I asked about that. It was perfectly done by simply... yeah right, asking!

If you read life story of great salespersons, I am sure they will directly or indirectly tell you that their key to success is asking the right questions to the right people. If you noticed great politicians, you will realize that they aren’t afraid to look dumb or humiliated by asking questions. I have never remembered any doctor except this lady. She isn’t the smartest doctor; in fact she is still quite young. However, what impressed me the most is the fact that she asked lots of questions before she decided what medicine I should take.

What is holding you back? Are you the kind of person who never goes on a date because you are too shy to ask a girl out? Are you the kind of students who always have a bad time in library because people beside you make too much noise and you don’t dare to say “Sorry, could you please lower down your voice?” Are you a mediocre salesperson who is loved by your customers but seems to never produce outstanding sales figure just because you are too afraid to ask your customers to buy more from you? Are you a miserable wife who curses your husband everyday instead of just telling him “Honey, we need to talk. We need to save this marriage.”?

If you don’t lose too much by asking, by any means, ask for it. You will never know if your girlfriend of 8 years has been waiting for you to tell her “Please marry me.” You will never know if your boss has some budget to raise your salary. You will never know if your customers want to buy more, but they are simply confused what to buy. You will never know!!

Will you be always successful in getting something you ask? If that’s the case, I would ask Paris Hilton to marry me. NO, sometimes you get what you ask for, sometimes you don’t. Sometimes you get some of what you ask for. However, you stand a chance to get it, unlike when you never ask for it at all.

Yes, you will never know, until YOU ASK.

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