bursting in tears..

.. and here I am, bursting in tears.

As fragile as leaves...

I used to think that I am very strong, and I refuse to cry no matter how painful it is. In my pray, I told God, "God, thank you for making me so strong. I am alright God" but God told me, "No Benny, you are not alright, Cry.. Cry it out. I am here."

And I am crying... "God, sorry, I am a failure..." but God answered me "Everybody fails, my son. Nevertheless, I still love you."

I cry... and cry... this is me Lord, with all my pride, and weakness. With all my sins and failures.

Here I am my Lord, Jesus Christ. Thanks for not judging me like everybody, thanks for accepting me as I am, and thanks for being with me when I feel that life is hopeless, that I am useless.

Forgive me Lord whenever I feel like suiciding.. I promise Lord, I will live and die according to your will, and I will serve you Lord.